Dropping the List

Years ago, I said to the Lord, “I can’t wait to see you face-to-face and ask you some questions.” At that time, early in my journey of faith, I wanted the Lord to give me those answers to prove my points of preferred theology and win debates with anyone who held an opposing position.

The Lord’s response took me by surprise. He said, “You won’t ask Me any of those questions because your inquiry and list were sourced in pride. Once you stand in My presence, all your questions will have been answered in love, without the stain of your pride. The questions you have been asking will no longer be necessary.”

I wonder how differently we would relate to each other if we allowed the Spirit to convict people of truth and offered to God, daily, every remnant of our pride. Like the stones that were released and fell to the ground from the clenched fists of the men who wanted to stone a woman caught in adultery, so it would be with our lists of what we consider to be the only acceptable version of the truth.

The longer I walk with God, the less I realize I know about Him. It is a perspective thing. My knowledge base is not shrinking, it is actually growing. God has become a lot larger and more majestic in the passing years. My meager portion of revelation grows smaller in relationship to my ever-increasing understanding of God. His revelation increases at a far greater rate than my ability to process and store information about Him. 

That expanding revelation has lovingly confronted the stupidity of my pride, my assumptions and every list I prepared and packed for this journey of faith. None of my lists and debate points were as important as the people they would challenge. At that point, I discovered an aspect of God's heart not on my list. That was the turning point that caused me to drop my list and simply walk with people in love trusting that God would be faithful to make Himself known to them when the time was right. In a few of those instances, it was me, not the other person, who needed to change.